Wow. What a crazy couple of months. I feel like I was getting into a great rhythm in LIFE..work, working out, family time, independence...also with my blog posts, and managing everything...and then BAM. Surprise! Baby #3 on the way, and RIP to me getting anything. done. ever. Ha.
I guess thats the way life is sometimes, once you get the hang of something, it changes.
I've always been really upfront and transparent as a person, and thats carried over onto this blog. We are super excited to add to our family, but it was definitely unexpected. I had so many mixed emotions finding out, the first being a little bit of shock. A little bit of...I'm not sure if I can do this again. A little bit of I just started to get a little more independence...and SLEEP.
But you can be sure there was a lot of excitement in my heart wondering if it was a girl or boy, and knowing this baby would fully complete our family.
I think deep down I knew I wanted to have one more child, I was just wrapping my head around actually doing it ALL over again. After all, I just stopped breastfeeding Seb in March.
Let's just put it this way: Since September of 2013, I've been breastfeeding or pregnant for all but 6 of those months. You guys...that is FIVE freaking years. I really wanted to enjoy the summer and just be me. Not breastfeeding. Not pregnant. Just me.
Thinking about a pregnancy, weight gain, and the stress/anxiety of expecting a baby and hoping everything goes smoothly...., and then when the baby actually arrives the sleepless nights, breastfeeding/pumping, and just adjusting to a completely different family dynamic. I just coulden't wrap my head around it.
Family of 4 was just so easy in my mind- we were pretty much through the tough part. Seb is 2 in October, starting preschool. Max is super independent. Traveling gets easier every time, and when my husband is home we are man for man. I feel like we can give them enough attention. I enjoy the one on one time I have with each of them. And most importantly, we have two HEALTHY, beautiful, happy boys that I almost feel greedy wanting more.
But there was always a longing feeling inside of me feeling so heartbroken to not snuggle another baby, breastfeed again, and completely watch another human being change our lives and hearts. You never hear people regret having their last child. You always hear people say "I wish I would have had more kids."
So, here we are. 14 weeks pregnant this week!
Real Talk: Let's talk 1st trimester, because it is OVER. Thank you Lord! I found out around 6 weeks, and within a week I felt like I had contracted the boubonic plague. Having 2 littles and one on the way in the first trimester was ROUGH, y'all. I can't even explain the fatigue. My nutrition was absolute shit. I had no energy, and tbh you're supposed to limit caffeine? Well caffeine did not do a thing for me those first 6-8 weeks. I needed some sort of AED to give me life!!
I had the worst food aversions. Basically everything that I would normally eat (read: clean) was not going to happen. I've eaten far too many pieces of grilled cheese, macaroni and cheese, and pizza the last month or so than I would care to share. I tried to eat the best I could (I'm prob not giving myself enough credit..but guys..the struggle was so so real) and I guess I've done a decent job? because I'm only up 5 or 6 lbs at almost 14 weeks. This is a little less than pregnancy #1 and #2 {{probs bc I never. ever. sit. down. with 2 toddlers lol}}.
Other than the lack of energy and nausea here and there, I've felt good and have been really active. The great weather has certainly helped keep me active, and even when I was struggling for energy, I knew a workout would never make me feel worse ((it usually gives me more energy)) so I think being consistent with my daily activity (steps, walking) and workouts has really helped me.
I'm feeling SO much better now, and excited to share my last pregnancy journey with you all!(yes, this will be our last :P)
Thank you ALL for your sweet messages and love over the last week or so! We are so blessed to have baby 3 on the way and all of you in our lives!
xo
Alex